I was just catching up on my emails and noticed a newsletter from The Homeschool Minute (through The Old School House). I usually, for the sake of time, jump over what doesn’t grab my attention and keep moving.
This newsletter did catch my eye because of the simple term “difficult child.” Now please don’t think by difficult, I mean “bad.” That is far from the truth. No, I just happen to have a child (and if you homeschool you probably do as well) that is hard to teach, which in turn makes things difficult. I end the day and wonder, “did she learn anything today?” or I wonder if I am going to fast. Either way I find it difficult to teach her at times.
So I opened the email and I am so glad I did. It is amazing how a simply email (or Scripture verse or phone call from a friend) can turn your perspective around. I was reminded that maybe I do need to just pull back, take a chill pill (though that is my term, not any of theirs), and RELAX! So what if she isn’t “getting it” right now?! My son had a hard time with reading. And now? Well, after taking that chill pill and relaxing, he is reading just fine.
I loved what Todd Wilson (FamilyMan) said,
“Problems arise when we, the homeschooling parents, take it upon ourselves to “de-difficult” them. We’ve followed standards set by experts who say, “At such-and-such age, a child should be doing this in school.” We try, they resist, so we try harder . . . and they resist harder . . . so we try even harder until we are in conflict all the time and they hate us.”
Well I don’t want any of my kids to hate me so I guess I better lay aside the “standards” and keep working gently and lovingly with her until we find what works for her.
Ahhhhhh! Big sigh of relief. Now I need to go play with my child that is no longer difficult in my eyes.
What has worked with your difficult child?